Why Don't You Believe Me?

Some people have no inhibitions, especially in public spaces like a library, a place for quiet study and personal reflection. Right now there is a demented mother attempting to teach her six year old child the 3 times table, I kid you not. This child has lots of potential. He rebels against the banality of the 3 times table, taking the mother on at her own game (I discover that the child’s name is Oscar! Oscar for fuck’s sake!), and starts to count confidently, from 1 to 10, only missing out on 6, 8 and 9.

With Oscar and mother safely away from the library a psychopathic lunatic takes centre stage. Mr Matthew Carlton approaches the information desk where he announces that he has lost his library card. It soon transpires that he lost this card whilst living and working in Swansea, and then, after some confusion, it is established that the card, if ever found, could only be used again in the Swansea library, it is clear enough for me, but not so for Matthew Carlton who still wanted the card replaced, immediately. The Library Assistant, demonstrating incredible patience, for I would have spat at Matthew Carlton by now, managed to sit him down, calming him slightly. Matthew Carlton was happy enough to chat about his work as a Credit Controller for a factory in Swansea and about his brother who was recovering from a recent knee operation in Addenbrookes Hospital, but panicked when asked about his current address, what did this man have to hide? Or was he just extremely paranoid or was he indeed his own brother? Unlikely. Carlton continued in this vein, haranguing the Library Assistant and insisting that a phone call be put through to the Swansea library, to verify his details, it would not have surprised me in the least if the library in Swansea were able to verify that it was indeed the same Mr Carlton. Fifteen minutes later Matthew Carlton had managed to negotiate thirty minutes of free Internet time on one of the computers. I suppose everyone’s likely to give in to the demands of a Lecter-type psychopath, eventually.