Brass Bands & Kabanos

THIS IS A LIBRARY AND THERE’S A BRASS FUCKING BAND PLAYING TO KIDS TODAY! (1 Jun)!

I will try and complain at some point but something quite hilarious happened earlier. Some poor sod of girl made the mistake of striking up a polite conversation with that fruitcake Josef from Romania, something about his enthusiasm for cleaning his laptop, – and now he is stalking her – she is blanking him of course, she realises that he is insane, but I’m not sure if this is the right response, perhaps she should just tell him to fuck off. His helpfulness is now completely over the top, offering her food, repositioning her chair to make her feel more comfortable and offering his Michael Jackson DVD to her on a semi permanent basis.
You really have to be here today - it’s more like a bazaar than a library. The Mad Woman In Red Coat is back again – this time on the podium and talking to some little kid – I hope they know each other, he does look frightened though – I should start recording some of this shit. Her son by the way has just come in and he is a dead ringer for her and he is a pig! He is walking around in a coat buttoned all the way up and emptying crisp packets into his gob. The headphones are on btw – “Oscillate Wildly” by The Smiths is such cool music.

Josef update: The girl has managed to escape however in the past 30 minutes the Romanian has devoured an entire uncut loaf – I think they are called bloomers – they are wide and fat – family loaves – and he just shoves huge chucks into his gob – then he stuffs kabanos salami sausages into his gob – eating them whole, in their entirety – This thing has to be extra terrestrial – from another galaxy without a doubt.